People come to China for all sorts of reasons. Some come because they love Chinese language and culture. Others come to get rich, others for that noble expat goal of “finding oneself.” Then there is Clandestine782, a “reasonably well-endowed” senior member on the International Sex Guide forums. He came to China for another reason entirely. “I want to have some hot group sex,” writes Clandestine. “My friend and I would like two girls overnight in one room and one bed… I’ve been to many barbershops, but (we want girls that) are younger, tighter, and have marginally better attitudes.”
Expats like Clandestine can find answers to their sex tourism queries on the International Sex Guide forums (http://internationalsexguide.info/forum/), an unashamed combination of wikipedia-esque prostitute knowledge and know-how, and a social networking site for likeminded sex “mongers”.
The forum professes to “facilitate the exchange of information between men who are looking for sex with women.” To this end, the site offers general information about where members can get the best bang for their buck. This includes information ranging from the price for various services, the specialties of individual prostitutes, and even accounts of negative experiences like that which one poster encountered with a working girl named Hebe. “Her English was good, but her choice of turn-on talk was a little creepy! Example, ‘You are a grandfather! You can be my grandfather and I am your little girl! I am very sympathetic to needs of grandfather!’ Ick!”
Beyond the righteous pursuit of helping sex tourists avoid creepy situations, the International Sex Guide offers assistance to those visitors to China whose language limitations might otherwise impede their ability to get the best possible service. For example, a senior member of the China board posting under the name Moody explains that “bai hu” or “white tiger” is the proper nomenclature when requesting that your prostitute be shaved. Moody also does his best to let mongers know how to break the ice with a working girl. “(Try saying) ‘wo shi chu nan, souyi xiaoxin yi dian’. It means, ‘I’m a virgin man, so be a little careful’. Almost always gets a smile.” Now, why wasn’t that in my Lonely Planet guide?
From opinions on the most passionate working girls (Mongolians) to advice on the best place to go for cheap sex if you are strapped for cash (university English corners), the rest of the site is chock full of helpful tidbits on China’s most stimulating offerings. However, even when posters like Typical Tourist describe their one time lovers with mathematical precision (“the girl from the BBS was a definite 6”), it can be hard for other mongers to really get a clear picture in their mind. Fortunately, the ISG solves this problem by providing premium users with the option to post their own pictures and view those of others. Although forum rules stipulate that you can’t just send in pictures of yourself, posters are encouraged to send in photos of girls they meet in any state of “dress or undress.” One of the more frequent posters, Scribe, attached his recent photos from a trip to Shenzhen with the caption, “Here's a girl from a few days ago. She was overflowing with wobbly bits, but in all the right places. 150 smackeroonies.” One poster, Eaglestar, uploaded pictures of himself actually engaged in sexual congress with a prostitute some decades his junior, writing “This girl absolutely goes bananas in cowgirl (also saves my energy, which at my advanced age is important). Must have had 3 orgasms on top. Damn I love it.”
No other option on the site appears as popular, or as helpful in accomplishing what seems to be one of the primary goals for posters – to sleep with and then compare notes on the same girls as their compatriots. Some may argue that the pictures are no different than run-of-the-mill pornography, but combined with detailed descriptions of cost and service they feel more like Zagat’s restaurant reviews than centerfolds. “They seem to serve like bizarre advertisements to help guys who are interested in finding and sharing the same girls,” notes Amy Sennett, an executive assistant working in Shanghai. “Looking at the threads, these guys seem more interested in meeting up with each other and swapping war stories than in getting to know any women.”
Even Pay, a research fellow based in Beijing, believes sites like the International Sex Guide are symptomatic of a larger issue in China. “Male expats outnumber females by a decent measure here. Conversations run sexual and, without women around, guys tell their dirtiest war stories. If one or two have drunkenly found themselves with hookers, their stories excuse and inspire further indiscretions. Like anything taboo that has been excused within one’s circle, visiting prostitutes can become a sort of bond.”
Whether or not this is true of the expat male population as a whole, the ISG forums certainly offer curious mongers-to-be a readymade social circle that celebrates and facilitates sex tourism. However, don’t think the ISG forums are without policies on morality. Although posting sexual descriptions, explicit pictures and contact information for working girls is encouraged, rules have been put in place banning words like “bitch” and “slut” that are considered demeaning to women. Members also abide by a strict code. When one poster named Tuscan Man talked about his habit of spending 56,000 RMB a month on prostitutes, others were appalled. One poster called Phill980 went so far as to rebuke Tuscan Man harshly for talking about paying such an obscene amount of money… on The Cheap Sex Thread. “Anybody who is willing to spend more than 300 RMB on a girl a night, should please shut the f*ck up in this section.”
Maybe they should shut the f*ck up all together.
My gut reaction is to say "I think its sad that men have to pay for sex in Asia, one of the easiest places to get laid" but then I think, maybe thats just it... if you're paying for it with cash, up front, there's something more honest than the odd one night stand where she may or may not even be all that good in bed.
When are we gonna get online forums for gigolo services in Beijing? City Weekend, any future blogs planned for men on the make? ;)
if you are really interested, you can check out my other blog www.jonnyhondo.com
jeez louise. i was just reciting the article to dan, including the 'wo shi chu nan' part, only to have my male coworker come in at the exact moment. cheers, johnny!
Blurpooom, I worry that you didn't understand the article. While maybe it is alright to joke about these sorts of things in the privacy of your own "Frat House", I find it very offensive that you would break up intellectual discussion with your "Joke". Jonathan Haagen has uncovered a great, no, monumental injustice, and you choose to use this as an attempt to poke fun at these poor girls. Bravo Jonathan, Boo Blurpoom.
to elaborate on jennwong's comment: our male coworker is this meek, Chinese designer who scurried off looking bemused and embarassed.
chaagen, you misunderstand. I wasn't poking fun at the girls. I love the girls!
Now, I know where to get more of them!
I am not the native speaker, so I can not enjoy the criticized tone from the article. But this writing really let me to think a lot. China can fulfill every one's dream, ur American dream, European dream, and my Chinese dream, and even those men's Chu nan dream.
"56,000 RMB a month on prostitutes"? That guy has definitely fulfilled his "Chu nan dream."
Nice column, J.Haagen! Still hoping I can get an early look at www.jonnyhondo.com.
Hot damn, I got quoted in city weekend! I'm sending this link home to mom.
Come on guys, you're grown men in Beijing, not 17 year-olds in Magaluf !!
Some guys can barely get it...some guys can get it ...some can get it easy...some guys cannot get it at all so they rely on the pros. And then there are the guys who don't know how to say what they want or get embarassed about it so they usually go to the pros too. Going to pros is a step in the "beta" direction.
I wonder if there in Beijing any male prostitutes who serve white women?
In 2007 my German girlfriend went astray with a thai gigolo during our Thailand holiday. A humiliating experience, which I never will forget and I went public about this taboo subject (google: "my girlfriend had paid sex with a thai boy") On the other hand it triggered that I now take asian serious as competitors for white girls.