Ok, ok, I’ve procrastinated long enough. I’m finally just going to open this nasty can of worms and write about my thoughts on vaccination. I’m not lazy, mind you, I just know how contentious this issue is so I’ve been dreading the backlash that will surely follow but here goes…

I really worried about vaccinating my child. I did a lot of research. I learned a LOT about vaccinations. I chose not to vaccinate my child and I’m not going to change my mind. I don’t believe vaccinations are safe and I also believe we are being grossly mislead about the efficacy of vaccinations.

There. I said it. Now you can yell at me or call me a bad mother or whatever you need to do to justify your stance on the vaccination question. You can throw the “science” at me, the so-called “research”, the “facts” and then you can finish me off with the “you’re lowering the herd immunity response, you’re irresponsible and inconsiderate to the rest of society because of your alternative hippie viewpoint” speech.

I know, I know, I’ve heard it all before. I used to believe that myself until I really started reading and researching and finding out for myself. There is a lot of information out there supporting both sides of this debate, fair enough. However, we are most often only shown or told one side. We are most often fed a party-line of “safety” and headlines proclaiming that the “mercury-autism link has been disproven” so we believe what we’re told by the medical professionals and the newspapers and we carry on injecting our precious children with heavy metals and other neuro-toxins.

We continue to trust that the people who create, test and research these vaccines have our children’s best interest at heart, that they don’t care about money, profits, control, and power, that they don’t have vested interests in promoting their vaccines that they have spent billions developing and precious little actually testing properly. We want to believe in the innate goodness of mankind, that it couldn’t be possible that the big companies, which are run by real human beings, really don’t care about that one child out of 166 who will be diagnosed with a broad-spectrum autism disorder after receiving the supposed “safe” shots or another neuro-developmental or autoimmune problem. We believe we’re doing the right thing and we tell ourselves, “Well, my doctor told me it was safe. If I can’t trust my doctor, who can I trust?” I say, trust yourself, find out for yourself, read for yourself and keep asking questions.

I’m not saying there is a big conspiracy on the part of the medical establishment to hurt our kids. I’m don’t believe every doctor in the world is on board with the evil vaccine manufacturers. I believe they practice what they are taught in their medical schools and that perhaps the information that they are offered is not necessarily the whole story. There is another side.

There is data that shows a link between mercury in vaccines and rising occurrence of autism. The very companies who are making these vaccines have done much of the research out there. There is evidence, much of it anecdotal, yes, but evidence nonetheless, from thousands of parents who believe their normal child became autistic after receiving certain vaccinations. What is the harm in investigating parents' claims instead of denying them? It’s really true that while the agencies that determine the safety of vaccines say they have removed mercury as a preservative (in the form of Thimerosal), they are misleading us. Actually it is still present. It's a matter of semantics.

It was removed for preservative use with a few exceptions such as the flu shot. Mercury still remains in the other vaccines (such as DTP, HepB) as residual left over from the manufacturing process. One can say its use as a preservative has been stopped (on a voluntary basis by some companies, but it’s not mandatory) but one cannot say it has been completely removed. Kids are still getting mercury and now get more shots than at any other time. When your child is vaccinated, they receive significant amounts of heavy metals. That’s a fact. Whether you believe those toxins cause damage to your child or not is another question for debate. The fact that they are present in the shots is not.

There is a lot of evidence that points to corruption and greed in the higher echelons of Big Pharma and government and to skewed research methods, data and bias. For me, it’s not a question of who is right or wrong. It’s not a question of blind faith either. It’s not a question of whether I’m doing the right thing.

For me, it’s a question of “what if”. What if the established medical status quo is wrong? What if mercury in vaccinations does cause autism, asthma, ADHD, mercury poisoning? What if by immunizing my child I am doing far more damage to his brain and developing immune system than a possible exposure to and highly likely survival of a childhood illness like measles, mumps or rubella? What if I let them inject my beautiful boy’s little body with 32 doses (yes, that’s right, in the U.S., if a parent follows the recommended vaccine schedule, a child will receive 32 doses of vaccine before they are 2 years old) of dead or attenuated viruses, derived from the pus of sick pigs and embryonic chickens and preserved with 250 times the recommended safe amount of heavy metals, including aluminum, formaldehyde, and mercury and he happens to be one of those kids who has a reaction? What if he happens to be that one out 166 kids who becomes autistic or develops diabetes or asthma or some other autoimmune disorder that increasingly affect our kids?

Maybe they are safe. Maybe I should trust what they tell me and vaccinate my baby. I mean, the powers that be have never been wrong or dishonest about anything ever before, have they? The coal companies never denied black lung. The asbestos corporations and the US government didn’t deny white lung to military shipyard workers. The tobacco industry never hid research--well, we know. Agent Orange, depleted uranium shell exposure, anthrax vaccination, lead in paint and gasoline…Have they? That’s the question.