Though it would have been sensible to write about how to realize my oh-so-short-lived New Year’s goal of losing a couple kilos, I’m a realist. Come January first, my main priority will be finding a place in Beijing to eat away my celebratory hangover.

A tried-and-(questionably)-true Chinese hangover remedy is eating the bile or gallstone of an ox, dried and pulverized into ox bezoar (牛黄) pills. According to traditional Chinese medicine specialists, bezoars can also be given to anyone suffering from high fever with a touch of delirium. I’d probably wash it down with a large new moon harmony smoothie (¥38) from Eden Juice Bar. Chock-full of carrot, apple and nausea-slaying ginger, a thick smoothie pairs well with a liquid dinner consumed the night before. Eden scores bonus points for delivery within the greater Sanlitun area (Tel: 5208-6086). Who wants to leave home with a blinding headache?

Another Chinese cure-all for last night’s indiscretions is the ubiquitous noodle soup, and my favorite stop is Noodle Bar in the 1949—The Hidden City complex. Its sleek aesthetics and hip location belies a unique allure for the mentally incapacitated. First, it’s do-it-yourself ordering. Much like Let’s Burger, you just check a box on the sushi-style menu and hand it over the counter—no dealing with pushy fuwuyuan or trying to force out Chinglish at the ungodly hour of one in the afternoon. The noodle show that follows entertains until a beef laden, steaming bowl of nourishment appears. A hot meal and a show, all for under ¥40—how can you beat that?

For those who believe that penance should be paid for a night filled with poor decisions, American Steak and Eggs is for you. This classic greasy spoon doles out a ¥59 jumbo breakfast that owner Paul calls “a real heart-burner”: three eggs, two strips of bacon, a slice of country ham and two sausage links. I usually choose the hash browns and a buttermilk biscuit for my accompaniment, though the grits or home fries would satisfy just as well. With three days worth of sodium, fat and cholesterol in the system, it’s time to rush home, clean the pipes and get on with the day.

Each year in Beijing brings new challenges, and I plan on celebrating the coming year’s opportunities with friends and family. While your festivities may not end with a New Year’s Day hangover, I hope they’ll include some delicious food, good friends and a lot of laughter.