We just finished week two of school and it’s going pretty well. My son has already missed school due to illness (there are some wicked back to school germs going around Shanghai!). My daughter remains healthy but if a child could be allergic to Math, my daughter would be diagnosed as severely allergic. She’s very smart, don’t get me wrong, but when it comes to the homework, math tends to be a source of extreme stress.

One day last week, while doing some math, my daughter and I got into a rather loud debate. I said she wasn’t trying and she said I was the meanest mom in the world. Ouch. Then, something surprising happened. She stomped out of the room we were in together and went to her older brother. She figured maybe he could do what I could not—help her understand. Sure enough, her brother quickly became the hero of the hour. He calmly, patiently, and kindly explained, encouraged and congratulated his sister as she did the rest of her math. I felt like the horrible mother I was accused of being moments earlier. But I was also very proud of both of them.

Developing good study habits is so important. It’s more important every year as the volume of homework grows as well as the complexity of the work. Add in Mandarin homework and we have a busy after school study schedule. Keeping the peace and limiting the battles is a constant goal of mine. Sometimes it takes watching my seven and ten year old to help me learn just how to do that.

I’m always looking for new strategies, so please share yours if you have any tips that have worked in your households.