We do many things to excess in the Paris of the East, but of all the vices to succumb to, the safest and least likely to destroy your family happens to be my area of specialty: food. From the free-flow Champagne brunches to all-you-can-eat Japanese extravaganzas, Shanghai is a proud city of gluttons. While buffets in the U.S. are generally reserved for Las Vegas and bad Chinese restaurants, the AYCE trend remains a fixture here, so I present to you here a few hints on how to maximize your free-flow forays.

[Also on City Weekend: The Best Friday Night All-you-can-eat Deals Around Town]

The Day Before
As with all serious undertakings, preparation is key: start the day before. If possible, eat lots the day before, mostly vegetables. The goal is to stretch the stomach but clear it out in time to give you a cavernous emptiness on the day of your feast. Also hydrate well, as water adds to your carrying capacity, and you don’t want to feel faint on your big day.

Proper Attire
On the day itself, wear loose clothing. There’s a trick with a hair tie that can expand the waistline of your pants by at least 4cm, but it’s a little hard to describe on paper. Remind me sometime, and I’ll show you in person. Head and wristbands are optional, but I recommend them for gastro-athletes fearing meat sweats.

The Pace
Pace is important, and I really must emphasize that. You want to be going fast enough that you stay ahead of your stomach, so I vote against breaks, as it’s all about keeping the momentum. Stopping just gives your stomach time to send messages to your brain that you’re all full up. On the other hand, if you go too fast you’ll end up tiring your jaw out and that’s never a good way to be TKO’ed. Find your pace and stick to it.

Killer Carbs
This should go without saying, but for all the amateurs out there, avoid the carbs. I know the bread is delicious, I know those potatoes melt in your mouth, but while you’re pounding noodles and rice your compatriot hitting up the beef and shrimp is truly maximizing his kuai.

Drinking Rules
For drinks, I have a pretty straightforward rule: no beer, and less liquid is generally better. Everyone is different, but I eat the most when I’m either stone cold sober or pretty far under the bus. Anything in the middle and I’m more interested in trying to be funny than in eating.

Last Tips
On a final note, performance enhancing substances are a viable option but generally considered poor form, while mid-session restroom breaks are simply good sense.

Now go and feast. I bid you all good eating, though my legal advisor insists that I let you all know that I cannot be held liable for any ripped pants, popped buttons or forceful ejections by buffet owners, I just arm you with the knowledge and step aside.

When Austin Hu isn't busy writing City Weekend's The Dish blog, he runs things over at Madison. Check out more of his articles here.