All the offensive expletives listed in the urban dictionary cannot describe my current state of misery. The weather is below freezing, any tan that my pale body incurred over the break is fading (you can’t see it anyways under the seven sexy layers of clothing I’m sporting), deadlines are crushing my soul and my eyes are burning from staring at the computer screen for too long. The only thing keeping me going is the prospect of a weekend. We’re almost there friends-just one more day.

Why not ease the pain and start socially lubricating Thursday? ROM is at The Shelter and Lola’s got a new ’80s and ‘90s night that will bring you back to your glory days and keep the blood flowing while you gyrate to tunes from your teen idols. If you missed the ‘80s completely, Erasmus night is on for foreign students at Hollywood Shanghai. Tonight’s theme is “English” so expect roast beef pies, gin and tonics and Oasis.

Wake up Friday, kick that hangover and caffeinate heavily through the day so you can go out hard and black out harder. If you’re in the mood for some live tunes Yuyintang’s got a bunch of local rockers and Livebar has some random punk bands.

On Saturday rush down to the Bund. Bar Rouge is closing (temporarily). If you’ll miss all the sparklers, bubbly, techno and babes make sure to get your fill before the renovations.

Sunday stay up all night or wake up at the crack of dawn for an American institution: The Superbowl. Pretty much every sports bar is throwing a bash so check out the roundup for the most rowdy or the one within stumbling distance of your office.