As we drive up to the white clapboard house, she opens the gate looking trim and bright-eyed. She hugs each of us and welcomes us graciously–and gracious is precisely the word to describe Madhur Jaffrey, an actress and author of bestselling cookbooks. Jaffrey is revered for introducing Indian cooking to millions through her books and her long-running BBC cooking show.

My companions and I are visiting Jaffrey at her 18th century house in upstate New York on a gorgeous summer weekend. She warmly shares her delight in cooking and sharing food, we walk the countryside; she reminisces on the mushrooms and vegetables she loved when she visited Shanghai a few months ago.

She didn't cook when we were together in Shanghai, so now is my chance to learn. As I watch Jaffrey's intuitive, confident, relaxed cooking (she rarely measures), I am fascinated by ingredients and methods I have never seen. Her kitchen is packed; the spice cabinet groans with jars. She's making sauce for prawns, she says, explaining recipes with perfect clarity. She toasts peppercorns and coriander seeds, then whizzes them in a coffee grinder. In hot oil she sprinkles mustard seeds and cumin seeds, an intoxicating aromatic combination that she uses in dish after dish at lunch, dinner and even breakfast. The mustard seeds begin to pop; a satisfying sound. She adds curry leaves, water, the ground peppercorns and coriander, chilies and turmeric. Finally, she stirs in coconut milk and poaches the shrimp in the sauce. When you taste it, you feel jumpy and happy because it reminds you of nothing you've ever had.

In the afternoon Jaffrey leads us through her garden, which she has lovingly cultivated for 20 years. She cuts lettuce and pulls radishes (which we eat later, raw with butter and salt). The immense green space is luxuriant. There are poppies, velvety irises, huge white peonies–fluffy like ruffled skirts, so large and layered they seem too heavy for their stems.

In the morning, Jaffrey is up early, cheerfully prepping breakfast. She has already cut peonies for a vase on the table. She is making Indian-style home fries, she tells us. We all scramble into the kitchen to watch. Into the oil go mustard seed and cumin seed ...

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