Eradicating complacency and trying new things

And thus began the summer of my discontent, my fanciful daydream crushed and shattered to pieces ...

I thought I had it all figured out, but somehow, in my effort to avoid the visa exile, I find myself locked behind a desk, boxed into the nine-to-six schedule that I've avoided my entire life, convinced that somewhere along the line, I've gone completely wrong.

In an effort to cure my maladies, I decide to break all the mandates and mantras that have guided me through the past 26 years in order to find entertainment in this time of drought, beginning with my aversions to voting and Bon Bon.

The joke's on me. "Godskitchen," as Bon Bon is known, was closed. My quest for new hangouts puttered out of the starting gate. I didn't realize that the Lord fasted, and now have to seriously contemplate if I'm gonna register for the November elections.

My search for answers quickly reaches an all-time low, when, for the first time, I decide to trek down Tongren Lu, hoping that perhaps I'll find quick salvation from my present condition. I'm directed to Flying Dragon, nothing more than an over-priced watering hole with the occasional professional offering a "shoulder" rub. This is no place for my kind and I dart to Manhattan.

Oh, the depravity. Middle-aged sexpats and Russian prostitutes, not my scene, although I do enjoy the pole-dancing women, no matter how trashy they are.

Convinced that Tongren Lu isn't the Valhalla I seek, I think the Bund must have more potential and, to my surprise, The Glamour Bar is quite inviting. I arrive in time to witness The Atomic Bombshells burlesque troupe. While the ￥60 Beam-and-Coke seems steep, topless women dancing like pussycats is priceless. For once I feel like my decision to branch out is paying off.

Then, for some reason, I roll the dice, convinced fortune will once again shine my way, and take a quick stroll to the infamous Bar Rouge. The punishment is immediate, witnessing tacky people dance to tasteless music with no substance–or clue for that matter. I die a little bit inside. No amount of alcohol will save me from this place.

Surviving this summer of 2008 proves to be more difficult than expected. There will always be LOgO, but it seems my niche may already be carved and opportunity limited. Regardless, the journey must continue …

Dan Shapiro