What to wear when going out in Shanghai

A few weeks ago on the streets of Beijing, after a rousing night of watching men tumble and flip at the gymnastics event at the Beijing Olympics, a friend and I wanted to head down to Beijing's infamous, and reportedly only, gay bar in the city, Destination. While we discussed which country's team had the hottest gymnasts, we were stopped by a sign at the gate: No Sandals Allowed.

I looked down at my dark jeans and dark green sandals and thought, "I should have worn my adorable red sneakers." My European friend was left with a negative impression of Beijing. "That's just ridiculous," he said in his thick, cute accent.

Coming from Shanghai, I suppose I had never considered the things that I wear to a gay bar to be that significant. To the best of my knowledge, gay establishments in Shanghai never have a dress code or tell their patrons what they can and can't wear. In fact, most bars here encourage their patrons to wear untraditional clothing for themed parties and the like. For example, Shanghai Studio recently held a "counter-fashion" party where patrons were encouraged to wear their most unfashionable clothes. So, to be told that I wasn't allowed entry due to my totally cute sandals, well that's just a crime.

While gay establishments in Shanghai may not care about your clothes, the patrons might. In Shanghai's LGBT bars it's not uncommon to segue a conversation from initial greetings to friendly banter with a throwaway line like, "Oh, I love that necklace / shirt/ hat you're wearing!"

The thing is, we gay men can be superficial and, in a city where maintaining your "face" is very important and a gay scene that hasn't quite reached puberty yet, the outside counts for a lot and often says a lot about you.

Generally, most Chinese gay men prefer the wife-beaters paired with tight, straight-legged jeans, because it's the best way to stay cool but look hot. This look can work almost anywhere. For the guys with muscles, the wife-beater is an option, but most prefer a tight t-shirt that still shows that they're the proud owner of a gym membership card. Look for these guys at LC or Eddy's. Or better yet, those who can, go topless, as was the norm at Club Deep before it closed. Being topless says to others that you are courageous and possibly available for sale. At Eddy's where debauchery is at a minimum, being demure is key. So, most guys wear button down shirts, pants and leather shoes.

Pete